Strategy

Dating is such a bizarre and funny world really. It takes ages to meet someone you're finally the slightest bit interested in and then suddenly there you are stuck in a strange world of cat and mouse games; both of you unwilling to lay the cards on the table in fear of scaring the other off.

We've all been on both sides of this dilemma if we're honest - the too quick responder and the spooked receiver.We've all woken with a wave of shame that descends like an executioner's axe dropped from overhead at the dawning awareness of a previous nights drunk text or, god forbid, dial. Conversely, we've all been hit by the tidal wave of retarded tingles at a message received from a too keen suitor and immediately hit the delete key in an effort to throw off the cringe cloud that has just descended.

I know there are those of you out there who claim you don't and won't play games but seriously we all know there are a few key moments in the dating dance when one must proceed with the utmost caution to avoid ensuring certain death.

#1: The Call Back
You've received the first, second, maybe even third contact from suitor, a rush of happiness engulfs you... BUT WAIT, do not reply straight away!  This would only spell disaster. Opinions vary and scientists have yet to uncover a hard and true standard which has left us all a bit baffled but if I can make one suggestion please never, never, never respond or call past 11. The assumption will be that you're drunk and let's face it, you probably will be (at least if you're like me)

#2: Overexposure
So there you are on a first string of dates and with the help of alcohol and good conversation you've been lulled into the trust tree thinking you can open up the cage and let out the Crazy. WRONG! Keep Crazy in that cage until after the wedding or for as long as humanly possibly for god's sake. We've all got a dork factor, some random interests and bizarre families but for the sake of giving this date the best chance, let's leave Auntie R, her snaggle tooth and opus dei-esque scary religion out of it for the time being.

#3 Booty
This is probably the most highly debated amongst the singletons, but I'd say err on the side of caution when throwing the goods around in the beginning. Many of us have previously misread an amazing date as being the start of a relationship only to find ourselves with our Number increasing at the rate of the national debt and no boyfriend to show for it. Now this does not necessarily hold true for everyone, especially those with rock solid self confidence, no fear of pregnancy or disease and a guilt free conscious that a Catholic would go to war to get his hands on. None of these attributes am I currently in possession of hence why I do my best to keep it 8th grade as long as possible.

As you may have surmised, I have heard from The Canadian hence the quick review to keep myself in check. A date is penciled in for Wednesday so tune in for more on that next week.